Friday 1st July,
Yesterday was Thursday 30th June 2016, the day of my Master/Sensei's funeral. It was Wednesday 22nd June at 10:35pm that my martial arts headmaster, Grand Master Shidoshi Graham Whyte passed away from Cancer.
As I sit here now typing this after a day's work, sipping my beer, calming down and condensing my thoughts of him...finally can I write something. Fellow students, juniors/seniors of the school, friends of my master were all very emotional, especially his wife Lena.
I was bestowed upon the honour of being one of the six pallbearer that carried our Master/Sensei's coffin to prepare him for the journey ahead. Maybe I am not very sensitive to these situations or maybe my peers had a deeper emotional connection with our Master/Sensei, I honestly didn't feel upset...broken or unhappy until the service...
You see, the service was held in a Church but with a Japanese twist to it, we the pallbearers remained standing next to our Master/Sensei throughout the service...it was when I saw Lena crying and muttering (I was lip reading): "I miss him so much!"...THEN and only then did the penny really dropped for me..."He truly isn't coming back..." was the thought that ran through my head.
When we arrived at the Crematorium...the feeling further hit home when the coffin was lowered into the area to where the cremation would take place...tears we're filling my eyes thick and fast...everyone was disheartened at the loss of a great man...tears from everyone...everywhere! What was I to do? Join them? No! I must remain strong, tears from my eyes can stream later, I must remain strong for anyone that needs to see someone who isn't tearing. With that resolve in my mind, I fought back the tears.
Master/Sensei Whyte was quite a teacher, he would get so excited and be so happy when you preformed the technique perfectly that he had shown you 10 minutes ago in front of him, senior black belts and your peers...the unmistakable "OH YES! THATS THE STUFF!! BOOM!!! HIT EM HARD!!!" was when you know you got it right...and that the Master approved!
Although he has left us physically, we all hold memories, teachings and objects that will help keep him alive within each one of us.
For me, I hold all three, memories of when I first joined the school, all the gradings that I went through which was ALL supervised by him, obtaining my Black Belt 1st Dan, 2nd Dan and 3rd Dan. Each was tougher than the last but it was all worth it! Memories of when he really approved of my techniques, memories of when he kicked my butt when I had bad techniques...his patience is teaching a dimwit like me...how he whipped my butt if I wasn't teaching the junior class properly and BEST of all...the memory I cherish most from him is when he personally showed my his own sword kata to perform for my Black Belt Grading...
His teachings are physical and philosophical. At the beginning it made little sense to me but with the passing years and skill honing of his wisdom I finally started to understand...It all began in the changing room after a training session. Myself and Sensei MacGregor were the only ones left and I started with the school not long ago...Sensei asked why did I wanted to take up a Martial Arts, to which I replied after a pause...to protect myself, we looked at each other for a second or two...I think Sensei was looking to see if I was being honest...Being Chinese and a bit small, I was easy target for bullies, mind you I was beaten up once and that was enough motivation to get my ass into gear!
Now I do not know what happened after that conversation between my teachers but I did realise something, they took a bit more interest...paid a bit more attention...(something like that)...to me. It was not initially obvious but it clicked afterwards (as in a few weeks after I passed my Black Belt Grading). I was learning and absorbing techniques like there was no tomorrow...they were teaching things that you only hear stories about and imaginings of Hollywood! Mind you...it wasn't glamorous...it was super effective to small OR large, muscular peers...and BLOOMING PAINFUL!!!
But I loved it. ALL of it! Ways that dislocates, ways that kill, ways that controlled, I learned the ways of a killer...(mind you, I never got into a fight, never wanted to fight or thought of fighting since joining the school!). I was feeling great!
Again, after another hard training session, it was in the changing room when all who was left was myself and Sensei MacGregor, he asked me how I felt and what I thought ever since becoming a Black Belt. I told him, I felt great! Absolutely over the moon that I have obtained a level which my teachers efforts have came to come to show. He smiled and asked if I remembered what my reason was to start taking up Martial Arts, I told Sensei MacGregor again, it was to protect myself!
Then he asked, what have I learned, so I replied, ways of the Samurai that were used in the battle fields, limb breaking, sword usage and deadly techniques! Sensei smiled some more and asked, so you can fight? I laughed a little and said no, I've learned to survive. "Good" was the reply! "Now that we've taught you this art, you are forbidden to use it unless it is in a dire situation!" With that, he said goodnight and we parted ways to head home.
It did take a bit of thinking for me to interpret what he said. Essentially, I was to use my skills only to protect and not to harm.
Later on I learned that Sensei Whyte and Sensei MacGregor had occasionally meetings at Sensei Whyte's home talking about the school...the affairs of the school and of course, the students.
(I am only speculating here)
When I first joined the school and gave Sensei MacGregor my reason for joining, he must have discussed this with Sensei Whyte of what I said, the tone I said it in, the way I looked when I said it...etc etc...and they both must of came to an agreement of some kind to teach me a bit more, keep and eye on me and to test me a bit harder than my peers.
Once I passed my Black Belt Grading, they must have revisited my initial reason, they must have wanted to know if my intentions remained the same. My intentions were never going to change and that must have been satisfactory for them both.
I learned to protect, not to cause trouble.
So what objects did I receive from Sensei Whyte? Firstly, the three certificates from my three Black Belt Gradings, secondly, a World War II Officer's Katana that Sensei MacGregor recommended me to purchase at the time when nobody knew the true value, to this day, best to my knowledge, only Sensei Whye, Sensei MacGregor and myself have one of these swords from the time ear and lastly photos of Sensei Whyte and I before my move to Edinburgh, at the time where he can still pack a punch and a half, the time where he can mop the floor with me with his flawless techniques!
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
You and the school have given me so much, I can only say thanks and bow my head low.
As we leave the crematorium, I bowed to you one last time, I hope you enjoy the Vodkas that I bought for you to keep you hydrated for the last leg of the journey my Master. You always enjoyed a nip or two of Vodka, it is fair well until we meet again.
Many many thanks and sincerest appreciation of all that you have taught throughout the years.
Missing you so Master Whyte
Yours truly,
Tze Yan Chan.
p.s rest well
Yesterday was Thursday 30th June 2016, the day of my Master/Sensei's funeral. It was Wednesday 22nd June at 10:35pm that my martial arts headmaster, Grand Master Shidoshi Graham Whyte passed away from Cancer.
As I sit here now typing this after a day's work, sipping my beer, calming down and condensing my thoughts of him...finally can I write something. Fellow students, juniors/seniors of the school, friends of my master were all very emotional, especially his wife Lena.
I was bestowed upon the honour of being one of the six pallbearer that carried our Master/Sensei's coffin to prepare him for the journey ahead. Maybe I am not very sensitive to these situations or maybe my peers had a deeper emotional connection with our Master/Sensei, I honestly didn't feel upset...broken or unhappy until the service...
You see, the service was held in a Church but with a Japanese twist to it, we the pallbearers remained standing next to our Master/Sensei throughout the service...it was when I saw Lena crying and muttering (I was lip reading): "I miss him so much!"...THEN and only then did the penny really dropped for me..."He truly isn't coming back..." was the thought that ran through my head.
When we arrived at the Crematorium...the feeling further hit home when the coffin was lowered into the area to where the cremation would take place...tears we're filling my eyes thick and fast...everyone was disheartened at the loss of a great man...tears from everyone...everywhere! What was I to do? Join them? No! I must remain strong, tears from my eyes can stream later, I must remain strong for anyone that needs to see someone who isn't tearing. With that resolve in my mind, I fought back the tears.
Master/Sensei Whyte was quite a teacher, he would get so excited and be so happy when you preformed the technique perfectly that he had shown you 10 minutes ago in front of him, senior black belts and your peers...the unmistakable "OH YES! THATS THE STUFF!! BOOM!!! HIT EM HARD!!!" was when you know you got it right...and that the Master approved!
Although he has left us physically, we all hold memories, teachings and objects that will help keep him alive within each one of us.
For me, I hold all three, memories of when I first joined the school, all the gradings that I went through which was ALL supervised by him, obtaining my Black Belt 1st Dan, 2nd Dan and 3rd Dan. Each was tougher than the last but it was all worth it! Memories of when he really approved of my techniques, memories of when he kicked my butt when I had bad techniques...his patience is teaching a dimwit like me...how he whipped my butt if I wasn't teaching the junior class properly and BEST of all...the memory I cherish most from him is when he personally showed my his own sword kata to perform for my Black Belt Grading...
His teachings are physical and philosophical. At the beginning it made little sense to me but with the passing years and skill honing of his wisdom I finally started to understand...It all began in the changing room after a training session. Myself and Sensei MacGregor were the only ones left and I started with the school not long ago...Sensei asked why did I wanted to take up a Martial Arts, to which I replied after a pause...to protect myself, we looked at each other for a second or two...I think Sensei was looking to see if I was being honest...Being Chinese and a bit small, I was easy target for bullies, mind you I was beaten up once and that was enough motivation to get my ass into gear!
Now I do not know what happened after that conversation between my teachers but I did realise something, they took a bit more interest...paid a bit more attention...(something like that)...to me. It was not initially obvious but it clicked afterwards (as in a few weeks after I passed my Black Belt Grading). I was learning and absorbing techniques like there was no tomorrow...they were teaching things that you only hear stories about and imaginings of Hollywood! Mind you...it wasn't glamorous...it was super effective to small OR large, muscular peers...and BLOOMING PAINFUL!!!
But I loved it. ALL of it! Ways that dislocates, ways that kill, ways that controlled, I learned the ways of a killer...(mind you, I never got into a fight, never wanted to fight or thought of fighting since joining the school!). I was feeling great!
Again, after another hard training session, it was in the changing room when all who was left was myself and Sensei MacGregor, he asked me how I felt and what I thought ever since becoming a Black Belt. I told him, I felt great! Absolutely over the moon that I have obtained a level which my teachers efforts have came to come to show. He smiled and asked if I remembered what my reason was to start taking up Martial Arts, I told Sensei MacGregor again, it was to protect myself!
Then he asked, what have I learned, so I replied, ways of the Samurai that were used in the battle fields, limb breaking, sword usage and deadly techniques! Sensei smiled some more and asked, so you can fight? I laughed a little and said no, I've learned to survive. "Good" was the reply! "Now that we've taught you this art, you are forbidden to use it unless it is in a dire situation!" With that, he said goodnight and we parted ways to head home.
It did take a bit of thinking for me to interpret what he said. Essentially, I was to use my skills only to protect and not to harm.
Later on I learned that Sensei Whyte and Sensei MacGregor had occasionally meetings at Sensei Whyte's home talking about the school...the affairs of the school and of course, the students.
(I am only speculating here)
When I first joined the school and gave Sensei MacGregor my reason for joining, he must have discussed this with Sensei Whyte of what I said, the tone I said it in, the way I looked when I said it...etc etc...and they both must of came to an agreement of some kind to teach me a bit more, keep and eye on me and to test me a bit harder than my peers.
Once I passed my Black Belt Grading, they must have revisited my initial reason, they must have wanted to know if my intentions remained the same. My intentions were never going to change and that must have been satisfactory for them both.
I learned to protect, not to cause trouble.
So what objects did I receive from Sensei Whyte? Firstly, the three certificates from my three Black Belt Gradings, secondly, a World War II Officer's Katana that Sensei MacGregor recommended me to purchase at the time when nobody knew the true value, to this day, best to my knowledge, only Sensei Whye, Sensei MacGregor and myself have one of these swords from the time ear and lastly photos of Sensei Whyte and I before my move to Edinburgh, at the time where he can still pack a punch and a half, the time where he can mop the floor with me with his flawless techniques!
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
You and the school have given me so much, I can only say thanks and bow my head low.
As we leave the crematorium, I bowed to you one last time, I hope you enjoy the Vodkas that I bought for you to keep you hydrated for the last leg of the journey my Master. You always enjoyed a nip or two of Vodka, it is fair well until we meet again.
Many many thanks and sincerest appreciation of all that you have taught throughout the years.
Missing you so Master Whyte
Yours truly,
Tze Yan Chan.
p.s rest well
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